GSM Cell Phone
corporate illness revealed

bout a week ago, my wife and I got matching AT&T GSM cell phones. They take pictures ... wow. And you can email them to others ... wow. And you can get on the Internet ... wow. Hot zowie!

And many ringtones are available ... Hot Zowie #2 !!!!

What's good about this phone?

It works better indoors than the digital one my wife had. That's the significant advance. Unfortunately, the rest is crap. It's crap because of the Marketeers who run these companies ... into the ground ... eventually.

cellphn2.jpg - 15kb The technology is fine. The problem lies in the upper reaches of corporate legerdemain They want to "milk" the technology for whatever they can get out of it, regardless of how counterproductive their milking is. They are in it for the money and nothing else.

You can't see it but there is on the screen "mMode" which is activated by pressing the upper right key. This takes you to the "Internet" (if you can call viewing two sentences at a time -internet-. How would you like to read a news article two sentences at a time with no pics? To me this is just plain stupid. It's only use might be to get a football score or the weather ... and I certainly don't want to pay for that nonsense.

But wait!! What about those wonderful ring tones? Oh happy day ... I can download any ringtone I want for just $2.99 or thereabouts. I could just die for Scott Joplin's Entertainer ringtone. Jesus fucking christ ... don't people have anything better to do than download ringtones? These things are like website icons. You should be able to download a thousand for free anytime you want. Why would anyone want to pay?

But wait!! You can also email a pic to another phone or to your computer. Yeah, that's what I need to be able to do. In case I'm lost in the woods, I can email a picture of the nearest hill to a Mountie and then he can identify my location and save me. Or maybe somebody just wants to see a postage stamp picture of my wife or grandson. Yeah, that's worth it!

And you can email yourself a picture and save it for posterity on your computer. Of course, you have to pay to email it. And you have to email it 'cause there's no USB port on the sucker ... because ... it's beyond our current technology ;o)

What it needs (mechanically) is just this ...

cellphon.jpg - 16kb

"Loop" the antenna housing so I can put my finger in it and the phone will never get dropped. (It should be a little more elegant than what I've drawn) ... and ... put a little tab sticking out the side (here exaggerated) that I can catch with my finger so I can open the phone securely with one hand. Is that too much to ask? Apparently so.

And ... at least give me the option of assigning the upper right key to something else which is useful to me ... not for you (hoping I'll hit it accidentally enough times to incur extra charges).

This is a two way street

Because the American consumer is so gullible, they can get away with this stuff in a "free" market. They are effectively the Cell Phone Cartel only because we let them get away with this trash called "marketing". Kill the marketing and give us the damn USB port and anything else that comes around which would make the thing more effective at improving the quality of civilization.

This is why I advocate some sort of government funded non-profit company doing the same phone business in competition with the free market companies. If the non-profit company were run by scientists and engineers with usefulness and economy in mind, they would force the free market to put out an honest product, i.e. in this instance, they would sell a cell phone with a USB port on it right out of the box and to hell with emailing your pictures to your own computer. Just download them ... and upload stuff to your cell phone ... and ... come to think of it ... I happened to ask the salesman "Where's the SD slot?" (for the 256 mb memory card, duh). It ain't there is it? I guess that's beyond current technology too.


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