A Progress Report

esterday, I was browsing a copy of PC Magazine and found to my surprise and delight that none other than John C. Dvorak has jumped publicly on the anti-excess-security bandwagon ... which I and perhaps ten thousand others have been railing against for half a year.

All his arguments are both cogent and reasonable as well as familiar to me.

He sites cases like the shoe-bomber gaff where passengers had to deal with an excess security which still couldn't detect him ... and which, in response, now checks "old ladies shoes" for bombs.

And as I have said elsewhere, God help us when some bomber decides to shove a wad of plastique up his ass. The letters A.I. will take on a whole new meaning.

How much of this will we have to put up with till they finally realize that the only way to stop someone from blowing up an airliner is to cut it off at its origin. Kill their God (Allah) and that will be the beginning of the end of them. Nukes aren't even necessary. Just smart bomb the Kabba and watch the next generation of Muslims bow to a hole in the ground where their God once failed to defend himself.

"What man has made,
man can destroy"

It works for gods as well as buildings, bridges and bastards. All that the new security is doing is to insult paying passengers ... hence, there are less of 'em and the airlines are leading the march to another recession. As Dvorak said, it looks like Mr.Bush is heading for a one term presidency ... just like dear old dad.

Look for a big blast on 9/11/2002

In a few days we'll see if Al Quaida (Quaeda, Kaida, Kaeda, why can't they make up their minds on how to spell the dam thing!) ... can pull itself together for a show of force to prove that they can take it. Personally, I think all they can do is take it ... up the ass. My present view is that they are just about comatose.

My idea of a big bang would be to take out the Statue of Liberty. If they could pull that off, they could regain some respect (at least among their own). This would be difficult as all such targets will be very well guarded as you may expect on the 1st anniversary. However, there may be a way of getting to it ... in a news helicopter.

Plan 9 from the "Monster" ...

  • Get suicide bomber (he may be running out of these idiots who tend to shy away from a perceived "loser")
  • Train as helicopter pilot (easy if done outside the USA)
  • Buy chopper just like "News 5" and paint just before 9/11 to look like one of theirs.
  • Go to the Statue to take pics of a "possible target" ... for the news at five of course.
  • This might enable you to get within striking range ... then ram it and the onboard explosives do the rest. Down goes the lady and America has another occasion to "weep" (it's main occupation in times of travail).

They might just do something a few days later when most of the heat's off.

There is a problem of scale unacknowledged in this whole thing

Why are 2800 people who die all at once together more important than the other ten thousand or so Americans who died that day from all other assorted causes? Is it because it is more fascinating or historic or capable of getting into Guiness? What's the call here?

And why do 2800 relatives get to decide what goes in the WTC plot? If you die in a car wreck under a highway overpass, do your relatives get to dedicate a new bridge abutment in your memory?

Here's a rough calculation.

Two trade centers at 200X200 feet each equals 80,000 square feet of "footprint" which these relatives appear to have a say in. That comes to about 28 square feet per dead person. So if you die anywhere your relatives should get dominion over that much real estate where you died ... right? Why not? Aren't you just as important as someone who got incinerated on 9/11 ... isn't anyone? After all this is the land of "equality" isn't it?

Maybe not. It's beginning to look to me like the importance of a person's death is regarded (perhaps wrongly) as being proportional to the square of the number of people who die together. Thus, your death alone is worth 1 point by definition (1x1=1)... then ... 2800 x 2800=7,840,000 ... or ... the deaths of all these people together is equal in significance to the death of all the people in New York individually over time.

What is the logic in this?

As best I can see, if you die alone, that death contributes nothing to the national psyche. But if you die on television you contribute just your "unit" (unless you are famous in which case you are worth more than one unit). But if you die in a "dramatis" on TV en masse, you have contributed greatly to the state of that psyche. And because it is increasingly difficult to get so many to die at once, we have to "square" the importance factor. Thus, in the Colliseum, if one person is put to death at the end of a "play" it has far less theatrical-psychological value than a death orgy with multiple burnings, choppings, armed struggle and sword deaths. Now that would be something!

There is also the fact that the dramatis was played out in movie length ... about two hours. In this time we can imagine all sorts of future Movie of the Weeks to look forward to. Thus, the victims of the sinking of the Titanic are considered of greater importance than the victims of the Lusitania because the Lusitanians had no time for any drama ... they just sank and drowned in two minutes or so before they could do anything real "pithy" ... like deciding to jump from a tall building to certain death instead of being burned alive ... what drama! It still gives me the "heebie-jeebies".

Also, as the relatives have started squabbling over the $$$ collected ... and ... the other "victims" of terrorism as well ... I'd really like to know where I can get my fifty bucks back. I sure won't ever contribute to such a thing again. They got way, way, way too much money. I'm sure a trip to Rodeo Drive & Vegas will help most of them though (and ... a new car!!).

The Army has been destroyed ...

Failure to utilize the army to fight in ground combat has effectively destroyed its identity. It's now clear that the army can never be deployed again no matter what the provocation. Hence, look for a complete dismantling of the army in favor of a small, computerised Marine Corps, Navy and Air Force.

Asta la Vista army ... you were great in your time. But we must move on ... can't spend money on over-trained fellas who can never be used anyway. You've been obsoleted by "smart bombs" and the weeping of the American people over "even one precious soldier".

What a war! Five deaths (mostly by accident). The Iwo Jima dead must be spinning to hear this called a war. It used to be that 50,000 dead made a "war" ... now it's five. Well, I guess it's true. In the movie "Blackhawk Down" (excellent movie), the Americans killed thousands in Somalia but 19 American soldiers died ... so ... we lost! ... because ... they were sooooooooo ... precious.

Remember when the Soviet Union fell ????

And Hollywood needed a villian? But what could replace all that drama and the possibility of nuclear war?

It was terrorists who rescued our cinema (or do you spell that without the "c"?). These are the bad guys of the 21st century. They are our worst nightmare ... a determined foe ... armed with ... a stick with a nail in it.

I don't know about you but ...

I'm gonna' go hide in
the closet ... and ... weep